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Bumper Stickers

Constipated People Don't Give A Crap.
Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.
If You Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People.
Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window.
My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.
To All You Virgins, Thanks For Nothing.
If At First You Don't Succeed...Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.
Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying, "No Hard Feelings."
If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
Warning! Driver Only Carries $20.00 In Ammunition.
How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He Is Lost?
The Earth Is Full—Go Home.
I Have The Body Of A God...Buddha.
This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me.
So Many Pedestrians—So Little Time.
Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?
Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.
Illiterate? Write For Help.
Honk If Anything Falls Off.
Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes.
He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The Next Exit.
I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person.
You! Out Of The Gene Pool!
If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong.
Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35 m.p.h. Are Also Timed For 70 m.p.h.
If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba The Hut?
Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel.
Cat: The Other White Meat.
You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me.
The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name.
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To.
It's Been Lovely But I Have To Scream Now.
I Haven't Lost My Mind, It's Backed Up On Disk Somewhere.
Boldly Going Nowhere.
Money Isn't Everything, But It Sure Keeps The Kids In Touch.

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